Being in a situation you can not leave and no one will come to your rescue. This was my Alaska vacation with my so called family. These are not my family in the sense of growing up my whole life with them as a major part of it. No. These people I never spent much time with ...and that was my first mistake in not taking into account before I accepted the invite to Alaska.
I never should have gone with them. From the second they showed up at the airport they were arguing. I mean come on! We're supposed to be going on this epic trip to Alaska as a family for the first time ever! But no, they wanna fucking argue the whole time. People that are bad to children will never have my respect. How you treat them says everything about you. I don't condone the behavior I was witness to. Why am I always the one to see things happen? Yes, I speak up. No, it doesn't change anything.
Let's add alcohol to the situation. I'm all for having drinks and having a great time... I'm not OK with drunk, rude, screaming fighters. Seriously! I don't want to fucking listen to you guys be rude as fuck to each other non stop. Fuck off with that shit! You're being a fucking asshole to each other, the kids, me. Have some respect for yourself and everyone else. Of course no one ever apologises for how they act the next day. Never.
Days of fighting, give me a break. Thanks for hoping in the truck I can't get into because I'm handicapped and leaving me alone at the campsite in the backwoods of Alaska... I was fine with it at first... But then this toothless golddigger showed up and was pissed about me being there with all this stuff. I was by myself. He was fucking pissed. I tried letting him know who my dad was and that made him more mad because he was squatting on the guys site and did not have permission to be there. I sat in the camper and waited while this guy angrily moved as much as he could. About a half hour or so. Then my "family" shows up. We moved camp about a block ish away from that crazy guy to some other spot we supposedly had permission to be at. No one cared that I was crying and having a panic attack.
They don't understand what a panic attack is. I couldn't stop crying. I felt like I couldn't breathe. My world was closing in on me and not one of them would take me away from there. I just needed to leave. To get as far away from that fucked up situation as possible and all I got was NO. A couple of days more, I still want to leave. Please just drive me into town and drop me off at a hotel. No. Finally I was allowed to get a cabin just a little farther into the backwoods. But still not allowed to leave. I begged. I was guilt tripped for wanting to. Fine. And then they go and do the 7 hour round trip into town to get beer and ice. I wasn't allowed to go. What the fuck! Are you kidding me? You'll go get beer and ice but refused to take me into town? I don't want to be here anymore.
After we finally got back, I got a hotel but I slept in the back of a Ford explorer for 7 days. Me and my handicappedness. They have no fucking idea how absolutely hard that physically is on me. They know I got shot but they don't know a fucking thing about how hard my life really is. They wouldn't be able to understand because first of all, they don't give a fuck about anything except alcohol. They really talk so terrible all the time. It's just sad.
So here's the thing... I vented on my Instagram. I didn't actually say anything that bad. I mean it was all true.. So I'm sorry if you don't like the truth. I didn't even write all the bad stuff on here. I have my limits on what I share. Some things just piss me off so much I won't write about them. So one person saw what I wrote... Then made everyone else read it. Are you fucking kidding me? None of those people are on there and you are going to go snitch about it to everyone? Dude! Fucking come to me first and tell me what an ass I am for writing it but to go and make my dad fucking read that? Fuck you, you fucking bitch! My bad for being pissed about how fucked up y'all act towards me and each other.
How the hell am I supposed to go face these people now.. Oh right, I have to walk into a room full of people and apologize to them for venting about what a bad time this vacation nightmare from hell has been. Oops, my bad. Sure, I'll apologize for writing it on a social site. But notice I never once apologized for writing it. I need to get to the airport so I'll play nice. Thanks for never apologizing for all the rude, inconsiderate, despicable shit you've done to me and in front of me but sure, I'll apologize to you.
On the ride to the airport my lovely "dad" thinks it's funny to tell me what a bitch I am and everyone else laughs about it too. Yes, I had a witty comeback however, fuck you! You're supposed to be my fucking dad! Remember the time I didn't talk to you for years because you called me every name in the book. Well guess what, this was your second chance and now you can fuck the fuck off.
When the plane landed, I said "Bye", didn't wait for a response and bounced! Found my husband, got my luggage and was gone before they even made it to baggage claim. I have ignored the calls from my biological father. I have a dad, he's the man who raised, not that piece of shit who donated his sperm. The rest of my "family" from that trip are no longer my family. Unfortunately there's always ones that you will miss and it will be sad missing them grow up but I cannot participate in the lifestyle in which they live.
It's done. It's over. It was light the entire time I was there. Flashlight was useless. I learned a lot about myself and others. It was beautiful. The company was a nightmare. They treated me horribly and don't even realize how horrible they treat people. It's sad. But I must move on from these people and never involve myself with them again. No more.
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