Unnatural fear of peeps

My bestie has an unnatural fear of peeps lol that girl is cray cray.... She will straight run and scream like a little girl. Yes, I am talking about that Easter candy that children love. I personally think they're nasty but hey, that's how my taste buds react so it's whatever.
      I'm thinking it's going to be full torture and destroy mode for the next month. She won't see them coming but they will be everywhere... Hiding on her windowsills... In her house... The bird feeder... Maybe I can get one in her purse... She has no idea the amount of torture from peeps she is going to go through.
       Hehehe that's what bestie's are for!! Bina & Jeskah 4-life!!

What a day

Ugh! It was really one of those days I just wished I didn't have to be at work!!!! Ppfftttt!!!!
    I walked into a giant disaster area, which I spent 2 hours cleaning up... I'm pretty sure that when I left on Thursday I cleaned up all my stuff, it's weird how I could have even thought it would still be that way when I returned. Grrrrrr!!
     Of course I didn't do anything to make my day better because I didn't plan ahead, go figure, so I didn't eat till dinner. I get grumpy when I don't eat.
     I get more grumpy when my knee hurts. And it hurt like hell today, still does. I almost made the mistake of trying to walk down stairs like a normal person, caught myself mid step... that was awkward.
      Funny enough, with how infuriating my day was, my bad mood is still better than other people's good moods. I guess they don't get it, this life we live is ours and how we choose to live it is our choice alone, so why not be happy?

Sabrina ‘TheGirlWhoGotShot'

The truth

The truth is, I struggle every single day. I struggle with the physical ramifications and the emotional aftermath of being shot 3 times in a drive-by. No matter what I do, it is there. Whether it's in the back of mind or right in my face screaming in pain. It is hard. No one has been through my story, my life, my pain. I do not discount what others have been through, it is just not what I have been through.

The emotional baggage~ I believe, at any moment, I can be shot. This is a fact that has happened so it is my reality. I try my hardest not to let these thoughts run my life but sometimes, sometimes, there is nothing I can do. It's there. When I cross the street and a car is coming, I have to force myself not to turn around and run the other way. I have to face my fears and fingers crossed I don't get shot, again. When a child pop's a balloon, I relive being shot and can feel, just for a second, what it felt like when it happened. There are so many little things that, for me, are big things and will constantly remind me of that  horrific day.

The physical pain ~ it is there constantly. There is no relief, my body will never be the same. I wish I had realized that when it happened but it took years... I really thought I would get better. I won't. My knee hurts with every step. My hip aches and feels as tho it will pop out at any moment. My neck... Sigh... I can't turn it as much as I want, It headaches, it hurts.

Me ~ Even tho I've gone through all of this and I live it on a daily, I am happy and I have fun but no matter how much fun I'm having its still there and it will never go away.

Violence ~ if you are thinking of doing something like this to another person, don't. Stop and think. Life is a precious gift.

Healing ~ being there for another human being can be the only thing that person needs to heal their wounded heart.

Weekend adventure!

What an absolutely fun weekend! My husband and I went to the Saint Barbara's Day Ball Saturday night. We had a fantastic time and boy we sure did look snazzy in our outfits. The food sucked lol as always! The company at the table was nice, found out after my hubs didn't like one of the guys... You would never know because he's always so respectful. I seriously love that man. It was great seeing all the different dresses and wondering how uncomfortable those shoes made them hahaha! 1SG bought us pictures, that was really nice of him :-)

Sunday morning went like this tho.... I woke up, looked at my Facebook, first thing I see is pictures of Mt Rainier, then it took me one sentence to convince my hubby we should go play in the snow! But there was a couple of things we had to do first. Get ready, run across the street to my grama's to say hi to mommy and Dave, stop n get coffee for me and a white hot chocolate for my bestie and deliver it to her work as a surprise -I'm awesome- then stop and get tire chains because they are required at the mountain.
The drive to Mt Rainier was fabulous and we, literally, squealed in delight at the first signs of snow. The rangers welcomed us back and we proceeded to head to Longmire.... there we decided to go to Paradise. We almost made it but when we went to put the chains on they were just a little big and we didn't have a bungee cord to pull them tighter so we went back down to Longmire. We got lunch at the hotel there- yummmm!!!! Then found or play spot! Perfect place to sled and throw snowballs and make snow angels and omg omg omg I freaking love snow!! We had so much fun!! I smiled the whole drive home :-D

My weekends stretch through Monday so for today I'm going to get coffee with one of my other bestie's and hang out with some friends! Woot! Happy Monday y'all!!!

This last month

This last month has been a bit trying. I knew 4 people, each affecting my world differently, that died. My heart aches for those families who no longer have their loved ones.

For me, it rocks me to my core and reminds me how swiftly any life can come to an end. Mine own included. I'm definitely a person who understand how quickly it can happen but even I tend to get into the mundane of living just to live.

While visiting the final resting place for many; I walk past a tombstone of a girl, a girl who was 17 when she died. That could have been me. A cold hard piece of granite, the last reminder of her existence. I feel for her family. I'm thankful for mine.

Right now, the sun is shinning and the whole world is waiting for me. I'm going to do what I do everyday and remember that this is my world and I am alive!